Worst Movie You Have Ever Seen?

[Aaron]

Self-explanatory.



and............GO!



 

[bloop]

"Silent Night Deadly Night 4".  I don't even want to know why volumes of clam chowder was proceeding from that woman's private parts.  Prior movies were at least good for a laugh.

[Brenden]

Not counting Mystery Science Theater 3000 movies?

Zeus and Roxanne was by far the most painfully bad movie I've seen that I can think of at the moment.

With MST3K, I would have to say that german version of Hamlet.

[Vlad!]

I have a friend who collects painfully bad movies (such as Hercules Against the Moon Men and The Brain that Wouldn't Die). These are just plain terrible.  

[BecauseEdwardISEdward]

With MST movies:

Monster a Go-Go. Directionless, plotless, and a guy who has to make his own sound effects when his phone rings.

Without:
This is kind of cheating, but of high-budget, A-list celeb movies, I think Oceans 12 may take the cake. I think its a number of things - the uselessness of the sequel, the flimsy plot, and the smugness (Juila Roberts as .... Juila Roberts!!) brings a movie that seems to be laughing at you, not with you, the whole way through. If it isn't the worst, it's the most loathsome.
 

[Usadingo]

Many disagree with me, but Moulin Rouge is still at the top of my list.

[Tom]

ahhh, there are so many good candidates that i cannot say there is a definitive "worst movie" in my book. but here are a few:

Constantine

any of the Left Behind movies

Sweet Home Alabama

Underworld

all sequels to The Crow (the first movie was great though)

Hope Floats

Jabberwocky (proving even Terry Gilliam has the potential to make a really lousy film)

and even though Plan 9 From Outer Space is supposed to be one of the worst films ever made, i actually like it. it is so bad that it is actually endearing...kind of like Captain Kirk.

[Josh]

Love is a Many Splendored Thing
Echoes of Innocence
The Visitation (in theatres this weekend! Woo hoo!)

[Aaron]

Titanic
Stir of Echoes
Moulin Rouge
Sorority Boys

[Vlad!]

Oh, another movie that is memorably wretched is Starship Troopers. The book is great, but the movie is terrible.

[murlough23]

I haven't seen a truly awful movie in a long while. I'm pretty good at avoiding movies that look like I will absolutely hate them. I occasionally take a chance on a film that turns out to be rather blah, but generally nothing so bad that it's offensive or downright laughable. In the past, however, some extremely negative moviegoing experiences have included:

Nothing But Trouble - 1991 comedy featuring Chevy Chase, Demi Moore, John Candy, and Dan Aykroyd. It was about a group of wayward travelers getting pulled over and taken prisoner in an odd New Jersey town where traffic offenses are punishable by death. The movie was baically a horror/gross-out comedy that gave me nightmares and made me realize that I just can't handle this brand of comedy.

Pulp Fiction - Now that I have a better grasp on what makes a film good (in terms of story, directing, etc.), I can't just slap one star on this film and leave it at that. The way that Tarantino tells this story non-linearly is genius, as are some of the ways that his various characters cross paths. But this movie left me disturbed and appalled - even if it involves retribution against bad guys, there are some things that I just don't need to see onscreen. Zed getting shot in the groin adn Marvin getting his head accidentally blasted open were not funny. I nearly threw up during this movie, and I was tense during most of it, not being sure who was going to jump out with a gun (or something worse) and multilate whoever was left alive. Not my idea of a fun way to spend a few hours. I've avoided everything Tarantino's done since then (I only went to see Hero once I realized that he was merely endorsing it - he hadn't actually been involved in making it).

Japanese Story - An obscure Australian film starring Toni Collette as a geologist who has to host a Japanese businessman during his stay at their site in Australia. It looked like an interesting drama about two people falling in love despite cultural differences. Before too long, though, it took a sharp, depressing turn into total drudgery. I couldn't wait for it to be over, because I just didn't care enough about their affair for what happened to really affect me.

My most recent bad viewing experience was Kicking and Screaming, with Will Ferrell, but I'd only give that one a D. It was shown for free on the plane back from Hawaii. I still wanted my money back, because I barely laughed at all.

NP: "I Need You", Rebecca St. James

[Josh]

At least two of my favorite films have no been mentioned here: Moulin Rouge and Pulp Fiction. I am offended.  :angry:

Actually, I can understand both, particularly Pulp Fiction-- I'll be the first to admit that that particular film is difficult to watch and, at times, far too indulgent-- as are all Tarantino films. Still, I just gotta shudder seeing them listed in this light...

[bloop]

Zed getting shot in the groin adn Marvin getting his head accidentally blasted open were not funny.

It's always been interesting to me how much tension Tarantino builds in that scene showing as little as he really does.  It's rather restrained next to many earlier Scorsese pictures, I thought.  I'll admit, though, that Tarantino's just the kind of director that demonstrates where being a little indulgent isn't necessarily a bad thing, though.

. . . and, yes, it was funny, but in a very "black comedy" sort of way obviously.  I did feel I was the only one to feel the tragedy in the situation when I watched it with my friends, though.

Great film!  There's plenty to discuss with it.

(Didn't care much for "Moulin Rouge", but I don't think it was a bad movie)

[AldaForPresident]

In recent history - The Island. One of the biggest pieces of shit I've ever stumbled across and I clean shit for a living.

All-time is tougher...An Occurance at Owl Creek Bridge is a HILARIOUSLY bad short film I watched in my sophomore year English class. I can't say I'm sorry I saw it, though. It was hilarious.

Dead Heat is one of the stupidest, most pointless movies I've ever seen.  

[bloop]

So, who here thinks that if everyone saw their choice(s), then all phorumers would agree that it's worse than whatever they picked?  I don't think I'm going to budge on that horror movie.  

Indeed, "Plan 9" was awful, but it was also a funny sort of awful.  MST stuff usually at least has that much going for it.

[Brenden]

I could name plenty bad movies in the romantic comedy or teen genres.

A Walk To Remember is actually my favorite movie to hate on, because it's a pathetic movie, and I wanted the girl to die.

Ice Princess is every teen movie cliche thrown together.

The Princess Diaries was a horrible film.

Saved! had the potential to be good, but it was really boring and gave an equally dangerous solution to the problems it brought up.

Angels In America count? Technically it's a play turned into a two night TV Miniseries, but I still hate it and can't find a reason to care about it.

[bloop]

Hmm . . . I rather liked "Saved!", but maybe that's just because the right members at cmcentral didn't like it (I'd say because they were a bit too much like those portrayed in the film).  

I do agree that it took it's conclusion too far, and it is a bit clunky in spots, but that in itself isn't enough for me to call it a bad movie.

[AldaForPresident]

A Walk To Remember is actually my favorite movie to hate on, because it's a pathetic movie, and I wanted the girl to die.

Word on so many levels. If I'm not mistaken, they actually don't show her death onscreen, and that pissed me off because I felt like I deserved some sort of vindication at that point.

[bloop]

Word on so many levels. If I'm not mistaken, they actually don't show her death onscreen, and that pissed me off because I felt like I deserved some sort of vindication at that point.

LOL!  Wait 'til Janke gets here!

[Brenden]

Word on so many levels. If I'm not mistaken, they actually don't show her death onscreen, and that pissed me off because I felt like I deserved some sort of vindication at that point.

No, they don't show it, I still felt morbidly happy about her death. She was supposed to be a christian anyway, so it's not wrong to feel that way.

Hmm . . . I rather liked "Saved!", but maybe that's just because the right members at cmcentral didn't like it (I'd say because they were a bit too much like those portrayed in the film).

I wanted to like Saved!, I just ended up thinking it was a pretty mediocre movie.

[dgp11776]

Bounce, quite easily.  Even my wife hated it, which is saying something when it comes to 'romantic' movies.

[Josh]

Cheaper by the Dozen was pretty lousy. (The remake, not the old one, which I haven't seen.)

And, on a related note, I really hated Bringing Down the House, though I must confess that it did have some funny movies. Not the worst I've seen, but one of the most frustrating.

[plvarona]

I actually haven't seen too many movies lately because quite simply, not much has interested me, so most of my picks will be older.  However, I do recall each of these movies being rather painful to watch:

Batman and Robin: You know you have a problem when your have an action movie that drags.

The Postman (the Kevin Costner film, not the Italian one): Speaking about movies that drag, this one felt like it was six hours long.

Billy Madison: I'm generally not a fan of Adam Sandler movies, and I thought this one was the worst.  I think I only laughed at one scene the entire movie, and I don't think it was a scene that was meant to be funny.

Wild Wild West: What a mess.  It was not funny, very pointless and poorly cast (i.e. casting Kenneth Branaugh as a Southerner does not work.)

As for other movies that have been brought up, I agree that Nothing But Trouble was pretty bad, although I did find a few scenes to be mildly amusing, so it would be more of a "D-" movie for me.  As for Pulp Fiction, I wouldn't call it a bad movie, but I just didn't like it.  Then again, I also don't care for Quentin Tarantino's style either.

[murlough23]

I'll agree that bloop probably has the worst pick of anything on here. No way I'd ever watch that gruesome of a horror movie.

Regarding Pulp Fiction - I realize that Tarantino is a brilliant director in many ways, and I know I'm fighting a losing battle by picking on what is perhaps his best loved film, but you know what, I don't care. He displays gratuitous violence with glee, like a little kid in a candy store, and there's something fundamentally wrong with the way that he and other are causing our society to be desensitized to it. Other films, like Saving Private Ryan or The Passion of the Christ, may also be extremely violent and gory, but the intent there is to re-sensitize us to how horrific and inhumane that violence can be, rather than playing it as something cool and stylish. I have a weaker stomach than most, so I won't even watch the films that I think portray the extreme violence in a proper light, though I respect what those films are trying to do. I have no respect for Tarantino's use of violence - as far as I'm concerned, he's an impish little kid. (He was good in Alias, though.)

Movies other people have named that I thought weren't all that horrible, but I can see why people would hate them:

Bounce
The Postman
Bringing Down the House - I thought this one was particularly hilarious.
A Walk to Remember

[murlough23]

One of the biggest pieces of shit I've ever stumbled across and I clean shit for a living.

Oh, so they've made you a moderator over at CMC?

[Usadingo]

Oh, so they've made you a moderator over at CMC?

Wakka wakka!

[AldaForPresident]

Oh, so they've made you a moderator over at CMC?

Ahhhhhaaa. Sorry. I only clean up literal shit. Figurative shit is below my standard.

[murlough23]

The Princess Diaries was a horrible film.

When my wife and I first met and I told her The Princess Bride was my favorite movie of all time, she thought I was referring to The Princess Diaries. She seriously thought I needed my head checked.  

NP: "We'll Never Know", Lifehouse

[Brenden]

When my wife and I first met and I told her The Princess Bride was my favorite movie of all time, she thought I was referring to The Princess Diaries. She seriously thought I needed my head checked.  

NP: "We'll Never Know", Lifehouse

Yeah, it's sounds odd to tell people how much the princess diaries was awful and then say the princess bride was really great.

[AldaForPresident]

I forgot about The Cooler, which is easily the most disgusting, disturbing, and just plain awful movie I've seen that I haven't blocked out mentally.

[Aaron]

I have to add Mimic

[Silvah]

Alien Vs. Predator. I have no idea what made my friends like it so much. IT was horrible. The only thing that made it worth watching was making jokes at how stupid it was. What a waste of my time.

Cry Wolf. What a predictable, lame, high school 'suspense thriller'. I actually spent money on it.

Paparazzi. Wow, lame. Horribly boring, pretty unrealstic at some parts too.

 

[bloop]

Regarding Pulp Fiction - I realize that Tarantino is a brilliant director in many ways, and I know I'm fighting a losing battle by picking on what is perhaps his best loved film, but you know what, I don't care. He displays gratuitous violence with glee, like a little kid in a candy store, and there's something fundamentally wrong with the way that he and other are causing our society to be desensitized to it. Other films, like Saving Private Ryan or The Passion of the Christ, may also be extremely violent and gory, but the intent there is to re-sensitize us to how horrific and inhumane that violence can be, rather than playing it as something cool and stylish.

I can't say any of these have desensitized or "re-sensitized" me.  My stomach is pretty strong, though, so I can take most any of them.  Haven't watched "Passion of the Christ", though.  Trailers just made it seem absurdly manipulative with its close, slow motion shots.

I have a weaker stomach than most, so I won't even watch the films that I think portray the extreme violence in a proper light, though I respect what those films are trying to do. I have no respect for Tarantino's use of violence - as far as I'm concerned, he's an impish little kid.

LOL!  OK, have it your way, but I'm not sure that murlough's "proper light" is the proper light.  The thing about Tarantino's movies is that they are, for the most part, pitting bad people or society's underbelly against each other.  Thus, wonton violence is the order of the day.  He just sometimes does that with cruel-ish humor (as he sees it, the people he's depicting would be rather desensitized to violence and wouldn't be uncomfortable with it).

"Glee" is mostly read into things when it comes to movies, but it is apparent that he doesn't shy away from that sort of thing, and sometimes, he does play them to be funny or a tribute or homage of some sort to a different kinds of shows or other film (knowing the references may help somewhat, too, but I don't catch all of those).  I do find some of that amusing - so sue me.  As mentioned in other threads, I find humor in darker places sometimes.  

With the violence, I don't see him as much different than someone like Martin Scorsese, other than on a stylistic level, Quentin likes being more absurd where Scorsese prefers being more "true to life".  Hopefully, he continues to connect with his inner martial arts, ganster film and anime geeks from time to time.

Interesting connection to "Saving Private Ryan":  Isn't "Inglorious Bastards" supposed to be a WWII film?  If that's the case, I might have to side with you on it eventually.  A certain level of sensitivity towards the feelings of people is usually in order for a movie about that particular real-life event.

To continue the trend of great films I didn't like much - I didn't much care for "Citizen Kane" when I saw it in high school, thinking it boring and mundane.  I like it much better now, though.

[murlough23]

Haven't watched "Passion of the Christ", though.  Trailers just made it seem absurdly manipulative with its close, slow motion shots.

Just because I respect what they were trying to accomplish doesn't necessarily mean that I respect the way they actually went about doing it.

Aside from that, isn't any movie that tries to get you to feel something emotionally manipulative? It seems like the only movies that really get criticized for being emotionally manipulative are the ones that fail to actually manipulate. I'd blame the methods there, not the intent.

LOL!  OK, have it your way, but I'm not sure that murlough's "proper light" is the proper light.  The thing about Tarantino's movies is that they are, for the most part, pitting bad people or society's underbelly against each other.  Thus, wonton violence is the order of the day.  He just sometimes does that with cruel-ish humor (as he sees it, the people he's depicting would be rather desensitized to violence and wouldn't be uncomfortable with it).

I can see that. However, I don't recall Marvin being part of that "underbelly" - he was just an innocent kid put in there for laughs when he got his face blown off. Also, I don't like the justification of the idea that the worst of the criminal underbelly is completely worthless, only serving the function of being meat and blood to splatter all over the screen. They're still human beings. (I realize we're talking about fictional characters here, and sure, who cares, but the point is that it's being played for laughs and I wouldn't find it funny if it really happened, so I don't find it funny here.)

I'm not about to criticize just on the basis of me not having a strong enough stomach to handle gory violence. I just think there's a level at which it goes beyond being realistic and truthful, and becomes gratuitous just for the sake of being shocking and counter-cultural. (Or because has some weird obsession.) Not that I'm opposed to movies being absurd and imaginative, but come on, do we really need to see this stuff?

[bloop]

Aside from that, isn't any movie that tries to get you to feel something emotionally manipulative? It seems like the only movies that really get criticized for being emotionally manipulative are the ones that fail to actually manipulate. I'd blame the methods there, not the intent.

I don't like to feel like I'm being manipulated or proseletyzed to, if that makes any sense.  If I think about it, I do know that it's happening all the time.  Plus, every Republichristian nitwit I've ever known has talked about it as if it's the best thing ever, which makes me want to leave some distance.  (I realize that's probably not fair, but I can't say that it hasn't influenced me in any way.  Plugged-In and the like has a strong repulsive influence on me).

I can see that. However, I don't recall Marvin being part of that "underbelly" - he was just an innocent kid put in there for laughs when he got his face blown off.

Marvin was, unfortunately, mixed in with them, and bad things can happen to the innocent for just being in the wrong place.  I'm not saying that it's great that he was shot (I was a little sad in that moment, but I did think the response of Jules and Vincent was humorous, so I felt both emotions).

Also, I don't like the justification of the idea that the worst of the criminal underbelly is completely worthless, only serving the function of being meat and blood to splatter all over the screen. They're still human beings.

It's not that it's wonderful as long as you're shooting bad people.  But, it doesn't play too hard on my suspension of disbelief to kill anyone, good or bad, in any sort of service to what's happening onscreen.  You are right that they are still human beings - and bad things do happen to people who are still human beings.

To briefly address the "it's just a movie" idea, then I have to say that I do approach fiction differently than non-fiction (which is why I'm a little hesitant at the thought of a Tarantino WWII film).

I just think there's a level at which it goes beyond being realistic and truthful, and becomes gratuitous just for the sake of being shocking and counter-cultural. (Or because has some weird obsession.) Not that I'm opposed to movies being absurd and imaginative, but come on, do we really need to see this stuff?

Do we have to?  Nah, we don't have to do a lot of things when it comes to entertainment.  But, I don't see any harm in it for someone like me, and I see where many of these things I've seen people complain about do serve a purpose of more fully realizing the characters' fictional personas.  Just seeing how a person would react to something like that tells you something about them.  In this case, it probably does just reinforce what we already know, but characters reacting consistently with that which is known about them is a good thing as well.  

But simple character-development may be just scratching the surface here.  With "Pulp Fiction" there could also be more to these kinds of scenes than I've noted on a more profound level, too, so I don't want to toss it out of hand.  That would be claiming more than I know.  However, just given what I've learned about it so far, I can't rule out that some of what appears gratuitous may be anything but, even if I haven't quite figured it all out at this point.

If this particular one has a purpose, it isn't realism or truthfulness (it's far too fanciful and stylized in places).  I think he mixes a bit of fantasy with the grittiness, kind of like, well, pulp fiction.  While I'm not sure there is a message it's trying to teach, per se (he doesn't seem to have a preachy sort of a personality - just a geeky one), it definitely has some interesting parallels that don't have much of anything to do with blowing the kid in the backseat away with a .45.

[worldofcm]

Two worst movies:

The Princess Bride
Monty Python's The Search for the Holy Grail.

I know a lot of you guys really really like these movies, but I honestly have never laughed at either of them.  They're just annoying.

[murlough23]

The Princess Bride

 :zoinks:

Well, at least we've all had equal opportunity to be offended here.

Actually, I can see why someone would not find that movie to be funny. A lot of the humor revolves around puns, recurring gags, and making fun of fairy tale cliches. That's not everyone's style of humor, and I can respect that.

I tend to tell most people who haven't seen it that the first time they see it, they'll probably think it's a stupid movie. It's in the repeat viewings and retelling of scenes to others that it becomes hilarious, I think.

Monty Python's The Search for the Holy Grail

I have mixed feelings on that one. Again, a lot of it has to do with catch-phrases and running gags... and sheer randomness in some places. I laughed at a lot of it when I finally saw it just because I finally understood where certain phrases had come from. Certain things like the Black Knight losing his limbs and the killer bunny, I didn't find very funny. As for the ending... I just kind of stared blankly.

NP: "Hurt", Thousand Foot Krutch

[Brenden]

As for the ending... I just kind of stared blankly.

I have that same reaction. I love the movie, though.

[theinvaded]

The Time Machine (new version)
Fantastic Four

These stand out to me because they felt downright painful to watch.  There are some bad movies I can shrug off (Doom), but these ones I almost walked out of in the theatre, something I never do.

[NinjaRob17]

In recent memory, The Village.
I don't really see that many movies, and most of the bad ones I see I just erase from my mind because they're so horrible. This one I remember, unfortunately.